We often say: my heart?s not in it anymore; my heart is sore; my heart is breaking. This is much more literal than we thought! In all cultures and religions, the experience of peace, love, healing and harmony are seated in the heart and thymus (responsible for immunity) region in the chest. Feelings of love also have a positive influence on the immune system, hormones and cognitive brain function.

Healing ideas for your heart

Ø Opening your heart to healing your physical body to release cell memories, optimise physical health and use the body to connect you to your mind, emotions and soul essence

? Identify body signals of severe stress: feel the pain, anxiety, restlessness, insomnia, depression

? Breathing exercises to open the chest area, expand the lungs, increase oxygenation of cells: belly or diaphragmatic breathing, bellows breathing, alternate nostril breathing

? Progressive deep muscle relaxation

? Specific yoga exercises: head, neck and shoulder stretches and rotations; cobra pose; half locust pose; head-to-knee pose; forward bending pose; shoulder stand, even if you simply lift your feet onto the seat of a chair; chest extension or fish pose; spinal twist; sun salutation; dead man?s pose to end

? Work with arms ? reaching out, drawing in with dance movements such as Nia technique, and slow, mindful movement like Tai ?chi.

? Following a heart health eating plan

? Using heart health food supplements and herbal remedies

Ø Opening your heart to healing your emotions or fee

? Work on releasing past emotional injuries and hurts

? Forgiveness of self and others

? Work on relationships, release of sorrow, guilt, acceptance of self and others

? Anger management: learn how to acknowledge the intense energy of anger and allow it proper expression

Ø Opening your heart to healing your thoughts

? Use heart centered positive affirmations and directed visualisations to sense feelings of love, joy, peace and happiness within the heart. Also using the image of the sun, placing it in the heart and then allowing the moon to place itself over the heart. This allows for a balance of male and female energies within the heart.

? Go on a journey of self discovery: deeply ingrained unconscious patterns of behaviour that do not serve you any longer, through journaling, psychotherapy, free hand writing

Ø Opening your heart to connect to your soul

? Meditate regularly: mindfulness, witnessing, visualization meditations work well for the heart

? Releasing the shadow deep inside the unconscious mind through transpersonal and soul based psychotherapy

? Quiet time, soul reflection and contemplation

The most important nutrients and herbal remedies for heart health

? An antioxidant combination with enough vitamins A, E, C and minerals zinc, selenium, chromium

? High dosages (50-100mg each) of the B-complex vitamins B1, 3, 5, 6, choline, inositol; 50 microgram of B12 & biotin; 400 microgram of folic acid

? Magnesium and calcium in therapeutic quantities

? Co-enzyme Q10 in therapeutic quantities

? Hawthorn (Crateagus oxyacantha) berry in therapeutic quantities

? Essential fatty acids, especially omega 3 found in cold water fish

? Ginkgo biloba in therapeutic quantities

? Garlic ? eat crushed garlic in your food ? at least 3 cloves a day, with parsley for the smell, or take garlic capsules

? Phyto (plant) estrogens, e.g. soybeans, chick peas, lentils, linseed

Homocystein:

- Have your homocystein (a sulphur containing amino acid) risk measured together with your regular lipid profile tests

- High levels mean high risk: accumulated homocystein damage the inner lining of the arteries, and encourages the formation of atherosclerosis

- A study done at Ohio State University in the USA, showed a link between high homocystein levels and an attitude of hostility and anger ? finally science has caught up with the mind-soul-body link! The stress associated with hostility and anger may elevate homocystein levels, accelerating damage to the inside of the arterial walls (atherosclerosis)

- The treatment is cheap, simple and extremely effective:

i. 400 IU?s vitamin E

ii. 50mg vitamin B6

iii. 50 microgram B12

iv. 400 microgram folic acid

- These nutrients ensure the conversion of homocystein into beneficial antioxidants. People with a genetic tendency for high homocystein levels, often have a deficiency of these nutrients.

The heart?s language and Mediterranean countries

The countries around the Mediterranean Sea have a daily siesta time after their phyto (=plant) nutrient, fish and olive oil rich lunch as part of their cultural habit ? this lowers stress levels by allowing the parasympathetic nervous system to re-balance the sympathetic or stress nervous system response. Soy based food forms the staple in Japan.

Heart centred meditation

Sit comfortably on the floor or in a chair, in a quiet place, with soft pink candle light, rose quartz crystal and soothing music if you prefer. Hold your back straight, chin parallel to the floor, hands relaxed in your lap, eyes closed. Breathe deeply and slowly and feel yourself relaxing with each exhalation. Do this until you?re completely relaxed. In your mind?s eye, imagine a bright, healing light shining into your heart. The light becomes softer, changing to hues of pink or green, associated with feelings of love, peace, reassurance, forgiveness and acceptance. The light dissolves all tension from your heart and chest. Feel all heaviness, sadness, regret, pain and seriousness lift and release, leaving you light hearted and joyful. Feel your heart developing its own radiance as though an inner flame is being rekindled. Allow this light from inside your heart to spread to every part of you, into the far reaches of every cell, molecule, thought and emotion. Imagine yourself filled with this light?s purity and wonder; your body, mind, emotions and soul healed by the radiance inside your own heart. Sense this light spreading into your feet and eyes to illuminate your path with love. Repeat the positive affirmations: my heart is light and free; I am always being guided in love; my life is filled with love, laughter and infinite wisdom; my heart opens with love, peace and forgiveness. Bathe in love?s feelings and light for as long as you can. Then slowly become aware of your body, move your limbs, notice your breathing, experience the calm and peace inside. Gently come back to normal awareness.

Heart centred wellness is an example of energy medicine and science combining in a healing dance where fact, mystery, imagination and soul exploration create an aspect of wholeness

Dr Arien van der Merwe

Author Bio

Written by Dr Arien van der Merwe, medical doctor, specialist corporate health & wellness service provider and author of Stress Solutions, ?Relax & Unwind? a relaxation CD, Health & Happiness and Training manuals on Wellness/Peer Education, Stress Management and Workplace Wellness.
For more info & to order: www.HealthStressWellness.com

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As what I have seen the couples who are presently having their relationship, they simply like to share each other, but they do not know what are the factors that they have to look out for from each other. Perhaps, they are pretty new in having their relationship, and they do not know what can be done in order to have a flourishing and sustainable relationship that they wish they can have.

In this piece of article, I will explain to you what the easy ways to a flourishing relationship are. I understand that perhaps you can be very desperate in making the relationship happen to you, but nevertheless you will never know what can happen if you have not tried out for yourself. As such, you do have to make a first move if you dare to try and if you are eager to make a success. Well, here are some easy ways to have a flourishing relationship under all circumstances. These have to depend on how good you are to manage your relationship.

Firstly, Expectations- Expectations play a big role in a relationship. We expect and when we do not get, we are disappointed. We may get angry and if the anger persists, separation results. The best way is to spell out all the expectations. Point out whenever you feel they are not being met and try to ignore as many situations as you can when your expectations are not being met. The second point that I want to address here is simply this word, Gratitude- Express gratitude whenever your partner does something for you. Husband takes wife for granted and vice versa. People are forgetting the art of saying thank you. Why not make

The third point that I want to share with you is the Happiness- If both partners decide, they can be happy under all the circumstances. Happiness is a boon. Things will always be going wrong. Memories will always come. But if we decide to keep ourselves happy, we can surely progress slowly to a state where unhappiness cannot touch us easily. Happiness is only one emotion. We are affected by different emotions – Anger, Love, Hatred, compassion and so on. What applies to happiness also applies to all other emotions. Emotions batter us at all the times. We are like a ship freely getting beaten by the roaring ocean of emotions at all the times. Once we decide, we can be happy.

Further up next, you have to test your relationship- There are few websites that offer tests and quizzes. Attempt all the quizzes on relationships and find out your answers. Ask your mate to do the same and find the answers. Compare your answers and try to find questions that were answered differently by both of you. That will tell you something about the areas your relationship may encounter friction. If you have done that, you will realize that there are so much things that you can do to make your relationship even better. Do not ever feel very stumbled and frightened off, the relationship quizzes are there for you to give your gauges and set the new targets for yourself so that you can better assess your new relationship level to a greater height. If you feel that you agree to what I have said earlier, do feel free to forward to your friends, relatives and peers around, or you can let them to visit this piece of article at my site. Your help and support is greatly appreciated.

I would like to suggest this point to all the couples, never ever stop communicating one another; always keep on talking to your love one, as they are considered the important ones who you would like to treasure upon. Also, the relationship would of course be made up extremely awesome as stay made up is meant for helping you to eliminate the break up in future. I wish all of the couples to have making up process a successful one and the future endeavors ahead.

Indeed, life is short. Don’t let another day go by without taking a chance on happiness. You will never know until you try, so remember to make a move today. It can change or affect the rest of your life, therefore, at the very least, you can try to come out something for your ex love partner during your weekend plans. With a little practice, perseverance and patience, I believe that your relationship could be enhanced with the tips that I have shared earlier. If you have faced any problems with your loved ones, do not hesitate to visit this piece of article again.

I really have a strong belief that if you can understand what I have explained and applied what you have learnt from this piece of article, your problems can be eventually solved and your making up relationship can become more stable and stronger. I wish all the best for your making up relationship with your partner. Do always remember to spread word of mouth to your fellow friends for supporting the decision of having making up than breaking up.

Jim Lim

Author Bio

How to win your ex girlfriend back easily?

Watch a video that shows you exactly what you must NEVER do, what you should do to get your ex back and why at Win Your Ex girlfriend Back Website.

You will also learn how to reverse the situation if you have already done those things that should NEVER be done.

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As in nearly all things, America has been of two minds
concerning the rehabilitation of criminals. One camp believes
the more severe and lengthy the punishment, the less opportunity
a criminal will have to re offend. Lock them up and throw away
the key. Statistics prove this camp wrong and alternatives are
far from their concern. They are the law and order people who
have a strong appeal to a society that fearfully sees itself as
victims.

The other camp wants to rehabilitate criminals but can seldom
raise the needed economic support to initiate and evaluate
rehabilitation programs. These are folks who know that no life
is beyond redemption or incapable of productive work.

Rehabilitation has failed so often because it rests on the idea
of stripping every right from a person, throwing them in a cage,
isolating them from the larger society and destroying any sense
of personal identity or value. Treating people worse than
animals is not conducive to self improvement. Rehabilitation
must begin by not caging non violent offenders. House arrest,
victim restitution, fines, counseling and work habilitation will
prove much less expensive to society than caging and produce a
better outcome.

Anti social behavior grows out of confusion and
misidentification. That is, anti social people believe they are
someone different than who they are at their core. They are
books judged by their covers; judged by people only interested
in

Rehabilitation begins by helping an offender find their true
identity. The tools trained counselors now have at their
disposal for this identification process are readily available:
aptitude and IQ tests; personality and character tests;
astrological and numerological charts and reports; literacy
tests. Poor readers are non readers and have a lifetime social
handicap until they want to read well. Probations should
continue until literacy is achieved. Once a person can read well
and wants to do so, they can learn anything else they so choose.
This opens a world of options previously denied.

Lives of total dependency in cages help no one. Not keepers,
the prisoners or the society trying to protect itself. To treat
a person as though they will never have an opportunity for
revenge and then releasing them with hearts full of fear,
resentment, anger and rage, guarantees that society will pay a
price for the way they treat people who were most often fellow
victims, long before they turned to crime.

In Orwellian double speak, society talks of caging people as
criminals paying a debt to society. The fact is the reverse.
Society is creating a debt to the offender, turning a marginal
life into a hopeless and useless life. Society is restricting a
person from any opportunity to contribute to the society he or
she offended; allowing no opportunity to support a family for
which they may be responsible; innocent victims of terrible,
thoughtless social policy.

Society has so long applied this cruel punishment that its debt
to the criminal element cannot be paid. Just like the debts owed
Native Americans and the descendents of African slaves. We can
go ahead and live our lives as though no debt existed and we do.
America will pay in blood, terror and plague – death and
destruction. It is a sad thing we have so chosen. Divine justice
does not allow for life in cages or a few living well from the
misery of many.

The rehabilitation of social offenders will not prevent the
judgment of a dispassionate, unrepentant people, long past due.
It could create pockets of mercy within that judgment. Perhaps
you and I will know a little of that mercy. Perhaps you and I
will make some effort to end a social injustice that is
worldwide and ages old. Perhaps you and I will no longer
ignore the problems some are paid to hide from us. Perhaps we
actually do know right from wrong. Perhaps knowing the
difference, we will choose what is right. Perhaps – but no one is
betting on it.

(PUBLISHERS! Free Promotion Here – Now! If you will leave a comment and your URL or hyperlink on this or any article of mine: 1.) Some of my on – site readers will visit your website. 2.) I will visit your website. If I like what I find, I will write a positive review and publish it here at EzineArticles. You may delete this generous offer when re – publishing this article.)

Ed Howes

Author Bio

Ed Howes sought and found, knocked and entered. Now he sees things differently. To see more of what he sees, please visit http://www.justanotherview.com or do an author search here at Ezine Articles.

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This is a difficult one for many. Some, however, are able quickly to move into that space of love again even if they choose not to continue the partnership. This is a test of our inner feelings of self-worth and security. It also tests how much we actually believe the spiritual truths concerning how our reality is created and what the nature of true love is.

The main obstacles to loving a partner who cheats on us or leaves us for another are the following beliefs.

a. The belief that our self-worth has in some way been diminished. This is not true. Our self-worth does not increase and decrease because someone chose to love us exclusively or not.

b. We are worthy only if there is at least one person who loves us exclusively and does not love anyone else in that way.

c. We are less secure without a love partner.

d. We have been dealt an injustice.

e. We will never find another person to love us in this way.

f. We will be alone and unhappy.

g. We will suffer this way in all future relationships.

h. We are not worthy of love or lucky in love.

This is a wonderful opportunity to free ourselves from all illusions that cause pain around this issue and connect to the following truths.

a. Everything that happens to us is exactly what we need in order to learn our next soul lesson.

b. Our self-worth is based on our spiritual self and not on how others behave towards us, or whether they prefer us to others or not. We cannot increase or decrease our self-worth. It is immutable.

c.

d. We are worthy of pure and lasting love exactly as we are and if that is beneficial for our growth process, we will have it soon.

e. I choose to forgive and love. That is better for me and all others.

We have dedicated a whole chapter on the issue of dealing with romantic rejection. If this issue is intense for you at this time, you may want to look at it now.

From the book “Love is The Choice”

by Robert Elias Najemy

Robert Najemy -

Author Bio

Robert Elias Najemy, a life coach with 30 years of experience, is the author of over 20 books, 600 articles and 400 lectures on Human Harmony. Download wonderful ebooks, 100′s of free articles, courses, and mp3 audio lectures at http://www.HolisticHarmony.com. Find 8 of his books at http://www.Amazon.com.

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Faking” is probably the biggest apprehension employers have about using personality tests during the hiring process. These concerns are well founded. Job applicants are confronted by more tests all the time. They are motivated to “pass the test” and come closer to a job offer. This should be no surprise, especially in tight economic times. To get the most from your investment in tests, you need to become skilled in test administration and interpretation.

Lynn McFarland, Ph.D., an assistant professor at Clemson University’s industrial/organizational psychology program and president of Human Capital Solutions, Inc., studies the “faking” phenomenon. She works primarily with self-reported measures, such as personality tests and biodata. “The psychological literature in general indicates that job applicants score higher on ‘social desirability’ on tests than groups we can be fairly certain are responding honestly,” she says.

Social desirability refers to the tendency of test-takers to provide answers they believe will be acceptable within the social norms of the test-giver.

“Job incumbents or college students, for instance, have no consequence tied to the test,” McFarland explains. In other words, people who aren’t seeking jobs have little incentive to provide socially desirable answers. But job seekers are a different case. “It seems that at least some applicants do try to “fake” the tests and are successful at doing so,” says McFa

How Big a Problem?

Employers have forever had some clear preferences in personality traits of candidates: Total honesty is a no-brainer, closely followed by the ability to control one’s own anger. Beyond this, conscientiousness, ability to work in teams and persistence are three top examples of universally desirable traits. Extraversion is also more attractive than introversion for many jobs, particularly when direct client contact is involved. But if the “right” answers are an open secret, is testing a valid tool in selection? To answer that, it’s important to look at some of the subtleties that experienced testers come to know.

Take the following examples:

Case 1: Some faking is devious and intentional. Let’s say an applicant for a retail position intends to shoplift. He or she does not want (lack of) integrity to come out during the hiring process. The applicant might try to “beat the test” by providing what he or she believes to be the “correct” answers.

Case 2: Some faking is motivated by a desire to look good ?in front of the camera.? Consider the example of an applicant who seeks to please the employer with the “correct” answers so they can get past the test phase and get to second or third interviews. This person does not intend any harm. They may simply feel that testing doesn’t show their real strengths and may exclude them from consideration for the wrong reasons.

Case 3: Some faking is based on an elevated self-evaluation. Some applicants? self-awareness is very optimistic. He or she believes they have many socially desirable characteristics. Whether they really do or not is a question for the skilled interviewer to ascertain. Careful review of educational and work history might affirm the possibility that the optimism is well founded ? or not.

For testing to be useful as an adjunct to interviewing and other hiring tools, each of the above situations need to be detectable by the employer.

How Tests Detect Faking

Most test publishers would not dispute that test profiles can be elevated or falsified. So they strive to overcome the problem.

??What?s the point? Anybody can fake them!’ We hear people ask that question,” says test designer Robert Hogan, Ph.D., president of Hogan Assessment Systems. He claims this can be overcome with the “faking profile” that his company’s tests generate. “We’re doing a whole personality profile,” he says of his organization’s tests. “They may be able to fake a whole scale (a single aspect of the measurement), but they won’t fake a whole profile.”

Clemson University’s Dr. McFarland affirms that faking often is reported through special test scales: “I think the most common strategy to detect faking is to use what’s called a social desirability scale, also called a lie scale. These scales ask the test-taker to indicate the extent to which a number of statements are true of them. The trick is that these statements refer to behaviors that are very common, but undesirable.”

For instance, an example of such an item is “I have never been untruthful, even to save someone’s feelings.”

“A test-taker who denies many of these undesirable behaviors that are extremely common will receive a high socially desirable score,” says McFarland. “The employer may use this to identify fakers.” She has some doubts about the effectiveness of this strategy, however. For instance, some people may have unusually high scores on “social desirability” scales, but may simply be trying to please, may have poor reading skills, or may have overly optimistic beliefs about themselves.

Questionnaire wording is one of the primary tools in the battle to thwart would-be deceivers. People who give extreme answers to questions are often – but not always -overcompensating to hide their true intent than those who do not answer with the extreme choices.

Consider the shoplifter/retail applicant mentioned earlier in the article (Case 1) as he or she confronts this statement: “I have never known a person who shoplifts.” The options provided to the test taker are: Strongly Agree, Somewhat Agree, Neutral, Somewhat Disagree, and Strongly Disagree. If the shoplifter is being honest, they would have to indicate “Strongly Disagree” because they themselves are shoplifters. The shoplifter might naively believe the socially desirable answer is “Strongly Agree.” If he or she gives enough of these desirable answers, a “faking” report will be generated. But what if the shoplifter is experienced at beating tests? We’ll consider that again a bit later.

Consider Case 2, where the applicant sought to please the employer with the “correct” answers. They are motivated by a need to get past the test phase and get a job offer. On the shoplifter question above, they answer “Somewhat Agree” or “Neutral.” This places them within the employer’s expectations from an honest person.

Such a test-taker, however, can face some other difficulties. Consider this test item (with the same answering options as in the first example): “It is very important to me that my career interests do not outweigh my personal interests.” Applicants like this one are not deliberately lying. They are simply reporting what they believe the employer wants to hear so they can get past the test. In some organization cultures or job descriptions, the person with strong career focus is definitely favored over the person who works at balancing the two. In other organization cultures or job descriptions, a very ambitious, career-focused person might be viewed as a poor fit. So what is the “correct” answer? Both extremes (“Strongly Agree” or “Strongly Disagree”) can be socially desirable, depending on the context. This applicant might assume that no employer wants to hear that a personal life is as important as work life, and answer accordingly. In fact, this may not be the employer’s desired answer. Too many such answers could generate a “faking report.”

Our third example illustrates how some people have inflated or distorted self-awareness. These people haven’t necessarily strayed from the truth – as they perceive it. For instance, effective sales people often have extraordinarily high adjustment or self-confidence scores on personality tests. Their answers might generate a warning flag, but that does not necessarily mean that they should be disqualified from further consideration-if they are being considered for sales.

McFarland, however, has serious reservations about the fairness of social desirability scales. These are special indicators built into test reports that warn employers of potential faking. “I advise employers to stop using social desirability scales until reasons for differences in social desirability scores across racial groups are better understood.” She notes that current research shows differences in responses among racial groups, and the reasons for it are not yet understood. “More research needs to be conducted to determine what’s going on here to ensure that personality tests are fair to all applicants,” she says.

Steps for Employers

What separates the experienced, effective user of tests from the ineffective? The dividing line is often defined by the test-givers ability to read the subtleties. It is also determined by following some preventive disciplines. First, employers must cover the basics. They must choose a test with proven reliability and validity. They must become knowledgeable about the test or tests, usually through the publisher’s certification programs. If this is not possible for an organization staff member, then an outside consultant who is certified and experienced should be considered. Some other key measures include:

1. Consider the requirements of the job. Jobs have “personality requirements.” For instance, the ability to work long hours without social interaction is far more “natural” to an introvert than an extrovert. Likewise, elevated confidence is often exactly what’s called for in an effective salesperson. The personality requirements of the job description can be examined through job analysis. This can help you assess the real importance of elevated scores in terms of your requirements.

2. Monitor the process. Though it may be convenient to have applicants take on-line tests at home, this can invite outright cheating. For instance, the applicant could have someone else take the test. (They could also be recording the test questions for distribution to other applicants.) All tests should probably be taken with adequate monitoring.

3. Use two tests. Let’s say you are hiring for a job where anger-proneness would immediately disqualify a candidate. Two tests may be advisable. The chances of someone successfully deceiving two tests are considerably slimmer than one. Hogan Assessments, for instance, offers companion tests-one that deals with the applicant’s visible, positive personality characteristics -and a second test to look at the darker sides of workplace behavior, such as tendencies to lose one’s temper, to become disruptive, or to be disrespectful of authority or coworkers.

4. Tell participants they will be discussing their answers at a later date. Dr. McFarland says this strategy shows some promise. It holds an applicant responsible for consistent answers at a later date. “Applicants can be told their answers will be discussed in an interview if they are selected to go on,” says McFarland.

5. For those who pass the testing screen, conduct interviews that are at least partially based on the test results. Some test publishers provide interview recommendations with the test reports, which can save time. If someone has intentionally provided false or inflated answers, you may spot discomfort or hesitation during the interview.

Most applicants are not informed consumers of tests. If tests become more and more widely used, it is possible that some applicants will become experienced at beating the tests. For the time being, though, faking reports — used with caution — and other current strategies offer some assurance to employers. They must be aware that not all results that look like faking are actually untrue. Armed with these skills, you are ready to gain the advantages of pre-employment personality testing.

Dr. McFarland summarizes, “I would use personality tests to select applicants. They have been shown to be valid selection measures. However, I would not base selection decisions solely on such tests.”

This article appeared in the January, 2003, HR E-lerts by Business and Legal Reports.

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